Thursday, September 27, 2007

Perhaps he was just too pissed to remember.

UPDATE: the Telegraph has made a handy cut out and keep guide. Defended by James Delingpole too, which is when you know you're really in the shit.

3. Ralph Perry-Robinson, 40, renowned, not just for the strange sunglasses, but also for slashing the cork from a champagne bottle with a sword and running around a quad dressed as a monk. Now a furniture designer.

Okay, Ralph is cool.

Original Post:

Apparently, somewhere in the newsosphere David Cameron has said he's only known Boris Johnson a couple of years.

Whether he said that or not, it's time to bring out this photo of the Bullingdon Club again:

bullingdon club

Boris 'The Strangler' Johnson, bottom row, third from left, David 'I Can See Your Tiny Council House From Here' Cameron top row, second from left. Tailcoats models' own.

Monday, September 24, 2007

Random blog update stuff

I get interviewed on Annie Rhiannon's new screenwriting blog

Graham Linehan complains about sperm-eating on BBC 2

Another Little Disappointment brings you the tragic pets video

James Moran talks money

Sunday, September 23, 2007

Flight of the Conchords

Yes, yes, I'm BBC 4's bitch now (did you see the Jonathan Ross thing on Steve Ditko? Just lovely), but please please watch Flight of the Conchords on Tuesday night (starts Tue 25 Sep, 21:30 - 22:00) if you can.

And yes, annoying if you can't get BBC 4, but it'll be on terrestrial soon, and if you can't get BBC 4 but are techno-savvy enough to read this blog, I'm sure you can find other ways of watching it HINT HINT.

I could put up a YouTube of the Flights, as nobody calls them*, but instead I'm going to put up something my close personal internet chum Godzilla Bankrolls found: another musical comedy duo called The Smothers Brothers, who made me lol as I have never lolled before.

* I coudn't, apparently, as HBO have pulled them all, booooo.

UPDATE: Well I don't care, I LIKE IT.

ALSO: PP points out that free delicious sample of Flight of the Conchords are available on iTunes

Saturday, September 22, 2007

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Stephen Fry's blog

Why did no-one tell me about his blog? 'Stephen Fry's blog,' they could have said. 'Let me show you it.'

From my cursory look, it would seem a bit like gizmodo, but just a teensy bit geekier (this is a compliment).

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Superbad and Knocked Up

I can't work out if I want to see either of these, despite being a huge fan of Michael Cera and Seth Rogan (the latter from his Freaks and Geeks days). Are they worth seeing? I shall let YOU decide.

UPDATE: also with Michael Cera - this looks great,

And I've been following the writer Diablo Cody's blog for ages (she used to be a stripper, you know), so I win.

Thursday, September 13, 2007


The timescale on this:

August '05: I have an idea for a screenplay about a superhero and his arch nemesis who have to go on a road trip together across america to save the world, and having read that Sylvester Stallone (my role model in all things) wrote Rocky in three days, I decide to bash it out write it over a long weekend.

My agent at the time, the lovely Ginny, sends it out to various places, all of whom like it, but aren't sure about the ending. Because it just sort of stops. Like this: stops.

April '07: my new agent, the just-as-lovely Matt, sets me up a meeting with the British Film Council. I tell them about the script that just stops. Natalie at the film council, who is beautiful and wise, and (more importantly) knows her superhero comics, reads the script and decides that it fits the criteria of Things The Film Council Can Help With. It is like a vet who has been brought a kitten which is cute, but hasn't been fed properly and is thus a bit wonky.

I am assigned a script editor, Camilla, who knows about acts, and beats, and all the other stuff we were banned from talking about in the Green WIng office (and quite right too). The decision is to focus on the dramatic structure of the script, because if you get that right, the comedy will theoretically flow naturally thereafter. Also, there ain't no-one going to tell me how to write no comedy, no ways, uh huh (apart from anyone who wrote any episodes of Arrested Development, they seem to know their stuff).

April '07- July '07: technically, the film council are funding me to write two further drafts of the script. In fact, Camilla and I go through about ten smaller rewrites before the second draft is ready to go before Natalie.

August '07: Camilla and I take the second draft to Natalie, who has some Notes.

Now, writers are supposed to complain about Notes, but Green Wing Boot Camp taught me a lot about working with other people and how to not stand defensively over your script like a dragon standing defensively over a superhero script (metaphor breakdown there). In fact, the trick with Notes is this:

1. If someone suggests something that would make your script better, put it in.
2. If someone suggests something that would make your script not better, do not put it in.

Natalie (and Camilla) give good Note, so I take heed. Some of the junior members of the film council also step forward and shyly, looking straight at the floor, say 'you know that bit with the supervillain groupies? We sort of miss that bit, can it go back in?'

September '07: The Third Draft (incorporating Notes, and That Bit With The Groupies) is delivered. I notice absently that while the first draft was a cute, indie sort of thing* that was mostly people in silly costumes arguing about what to put on the radio, the third has laser satellites, a giant robot fight and scene descriptions like 'EXT. THE EDGE OF SPACE - DAY' (although it does have people in silly costumes arguing about what to put on the radio as well). It's like a proper film and everything, although that does mean the bit in my wikipedia page about it being low-budget isn't really true any more, and it's not really cool to edit your own wikipedia page, so if anyone feels like taking out that bit, I'd be terribly grateful.

Yesterday: I am taken out for steak and chips by the film council. I also have a glass of very nice Rioja. Draft Three is pronounced Good, and the next phase, getting it out to the right producer and/or studio, can begin.

And that, children, is how a script is made.

PS - I forgot - earlier this week, I read that Sylvester Stallone wrote Rocky in seven days, not three. We can laugh about this when we next meet.

* Although that's clearly contradicted by this post.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Bearded Ladies tonight

quick reminder from Ori:

"Just to say our radio show 'MEANWHILE WITH THE BEARDED LADIES' starts tonight (11/09/07) on Radio 4 at 6.30. It features Fay, Susie, Charlotte and me along with Mark Addy, Cav Clerken, James Lance, Alex Lowe and a special appearance by Ronnie Corbett.

Its on for the next four weeks - that's every Tuesday. Or you can 'listen again' on the BBC web site"

Also, I don't know why colourlovers is cool, it just is. Mmm, palettes...

I like this one:

BLIMEY THIS IS INTERESTING: the colours of Islam. Wow.

Thursday, September 06, 2007

Go Stephen Merchant

Always nice to see a bit of loyalty. Particularly when it's done very very slowly. I particularly liked the 'paused to scratch his cheek' bit.

Wednesday, September 05, 2007


You'd think that if putting a couple of drops of Olbas Oil on a pillow helps relieve blocked sinuses a bit, and putting some on a tissue and sniffing it helps relieve them a lot, then actually sploshing drops of Olbas Oil right up inside your nose would help amazing amounts, wouldn't you?

Yes, I went there. Vision has now mostly returned to my left eye, hurrah.

Sunday, September 02, 2007

'Spling! Pang! Flimb!'

Because I loved the Modernism exhibition at the V&A recently, and my knowledge of classical music is slim to non-existent, I bought the specially-compiled Modernism in Music CD.

And because I know a couple of readers of this blog actually know something about classical music, I now wonder if they could answer for me the question 'is there any classic music which follows the strictures and tenets of modernism, but doesn't actually sound like three bags of hammers exploding in a windchime factory/that bit in Roger Rabbit where Daffy and Donald have a big piano fight?'

So far, this is six quid I won't be getting back.

Wait, some lad's come in with an oboe.

No, he's gone again.

UPDATE: none of it is anywhere near as utterly great as Hey, I really like Little Miss Cypher from the first second Pepe Deluxe album as made freely downloadable here and sent to me as part of a compilation yesterday by Patchy McGirlfriend, god bless her.

Now that's what I call "expanding sonic palettes, breaking tonal conventions and experimenting readily with a new found freedom of expression", in your face Bartok.