Sunday, August 21, 2005


Wandering along a country path today, I saw a large Alsatian spinning madly on the spot, while a man next to him, holding a lead, threw up rather extravagantly into a bush.

I can only assume they were having some kind of contest, which the owner lost. Perhaps he'll be sleeping outside tonight, while the Alsatian reclines comfortably on a sofa, picking languidly through a box of Dairy Milk whilst watching repeats of Top Gear. This is only a guess.

I really wish I'd asked now.

Maybe I'll go back.


cello said...

Are you sure you hadn't wandered onto the set of 'Lost'?

James Henry said...

Tragically enough, I earlier picked some blackberries and came away with a real sense of 'D'you know, I could probably survive in the wild, if I had to.'

But not if I said 'Ooh, blackberries!' out loud to myself, like I did then. The other survivors would probably beat me to death straight away, and I honestly wouldn't blame them.

Have you seen the 'swooping' footage showing something flying into and over the second turbine as it explodes?

It's terribly exciting. Also the little black kid was looking at a comic with a polar bear in it in the first ep.

I bet it won't make any sense at the end, and my viewing dedication will have been wasted all over again. Tch

cello said...

"Have I seen the 'swooping' footage...?" I've seen everything - of course. How could I not have been seduced by those pretentious trailers.

I'm just at that point when you have to decide you're going to give into mindless addiction, or give it all up and go and read some Yeats. It's very classy hokum, but still not as good as 'Twin Peaks'.

Saying "Ooh, blackberries!", by the way, could have various consequences; you might be snapped up for 'Ready, Steady Cook', or Strictly Come Dancing. A person of restricted growth might leap out of the bushes tempting you with a ready made crumble or other confection. (I went to Charlie and the CF last week). A secret surveillance camera might record you removing endangered fruits from the wild and lead to an ASBO.

Blackberries taste delicious but have a nasty texture. Picking them is marvellous fun though. If you do ever have to survive in the wild, make sure it's during August or September.

Anonymous said...

They're called Alsatians.

James Henry said...

I was going to say German Shepherd, but I thought people might get confused.

Anonymous said...

Ooh, swoopy thing! You can't take your eyes off the screen for a second, can you?

Mindless addiction is the only way forward with Lost (especially if GW2 won't be on till Jan) though all this compulsory TV watching might be the reason I don't get so much reading done these days...

Anonymous said...

Maybe... the dog did an exciting and artistic poo and the owner was less than impressed by it?

And no new GW until January? *wail*