I'm currently in the pleasing position of having one largish comedic thing in the offing, and one smaller comedic thing in the offing also. However neither of the contracts have come yet, so I am free to traipse about the coast and fields of Cornwall idly pretending I'm thinking of amusing things in preparation for said comedic things, whereas in fact if you could listen to the inside of my head, it would be making the sort of noise a satellite makes whilst whooshing through space in a film.
Sort of 'Pshhhhhh..... bip. Pshhhhhh.....bip'.'
However I have saved up for just this sort of eventuality two reported news headlines from Radio Cornwall that m'colleague Richard swears he really actually did hear whilst on holiday.
1. "The traffic trouble in Penzance is over. The hay has been cleared off the road and the town has calmed down now."
2. "The fair in Truro will be having a special afternoon for the disabled. The rides of course, going just that little bit slower.
To add to these, I discovered today that when my Grandad moved down here to become a County Planning Officer, someone immediately tried to bribe him with a bag of turnips. Marvellous.
Tonight's episode of Green Wing will apparently see fellow blogger Ori (Bearded Lady) being violated in the back of a taxi by Mister Mark Heap. I have set my video, and I hope you will too.
I would also add that the GW DVD signing is now at Virgin Megastore (not HMV, who it turns out are rubbish and smell) on Oxford St (next to Tottenham Court Rd tube) at 6pm on Tuesday 11th April. Currently Mr S. Mangan, Mr J. Rhind-Tutt and Mr O. Chris are aligned attendencewards, perhaps with more to follow. I bumped into Oli on the London Street last week and he was hobbling around on one foot*, an injury he told me had come from kicking a baby into a fire, although I later ascertained it to be in fact some sort of sporting injury. What a strange young man.
* the other one was in a cast.