Monday, July 31, 2006

Zap and Pow

Thanks be to Sparrowhawk, who suggested I get the Intego Virus Barrier to cleanse and purify my iBook, because it seems to have worked.

What I liked about it (even apart from the working) was that they clearly realized that the average Mac user's knowledge of how computers work is gleaned solely from the film 'Tron' (which, spooky woo, was on this weekend, but I thought this before I saw it again). Thus the Virus Barrier interface is designed to look like a particularly futuristic First Person Shooter, complete with Eighties-style LED countdown as it checks files.

Now because my knowledge of how computers work is gleaned solely from the film 'Tron' , I like to ascribe a look to each application as it scurries around the inside of my laptop. I have a whole range of in-head concept designs ranging from:

1. Cool sexy robot ladies like the ones from that Bjork video,

to:

2. Cool sexy robot ladies like Morrigun from the ABC Warriors.

And Intego knew this, because when after about twenty minute the Virus Barrier found an infected file, it sound 'Infected file found' in a slightly breathy female voice. And later when I clicked on 'repair file' it said 'virus deleted' with just a hint of haughty froideur (may have made that word up), with an underlying tone 'and when sir is ready to stop arsing about and give me a real job to do, sir is surely aware that sir only has to ask...'

Also, can you believe the foyer of BBC TV Centre isn't a wi-fi zone? Sometimes I wonder what exactly I pay mice licence fees for*




*that was a genuine typo, but I'm going to keep it.

24 comments:

Rabidus Badgerus said...

"virus delected"? :-D

The mice have got you exactly where they want you, I see.

james henry said...

Gah, duly amended.

Also double post, thanks to button for spotting the double post. Later I will try and embed the bjork video, but not yet.

Button said...

ooh. you lost my incredibly fascinating story of childhood identity crisis.
this is a good thing.

Jayne said...

Lots of cool, sexy robot ladies in there James. What an interesting place the inside of your head must be...

Jen said...

Damn. You were in the BBC TV Centre this week? I've been in London for five days and every spare second was devoted to trying to find Shepherd's Bush.

But could I? Nooooo. I ended up at the ITV studos.

Yuck.

Anonymous said...

froideur, I think

Button said...

just had a look at that ABC warriors link.

hmmm.

Button said...

that was meant to be a slighty confused/worried hmmm rather than a lecherous one by the way.

mind you this is coming from someone who thought that I'd never find a real guy that could live up to Dangermouse.

Heather said...

No real man will ever live up to Dangermouse button.

It's a sad fact, but we just have to accept it and move on with our lives.

james henry said...

Most days I can barely live up to Penfold.

Spinsterella said...

Jen: how to find Shephers's Bush.

1. Get on Tube.

2. Go to Shepherd's Bush. (Handily, the stop is actually *called* Shepherd's Bush.)

(Should I mention that the stop for the beeb is actually White City? Nah..)

woot said...

Penfold was great! I used to work with a man who looked spookily like him and I used to spend ages staring at him and humming the theme tune...

I don't work there any more...

james henry said...

Hello Spinny, totally agree with you about that godforsaken Guardian article by the way. If any of those smug twonts had brought their ghastly spawn into my bookshop back in the day, I would have.... well, been really annoyed.

REALLY annoyed.

I once suggested on the Guardian blog thing that maybe letting your kids watch telly at half six in the morning before they went to school was a tad unhealthy, and wow that didn't go down well. Apparently not having children myself precluudes me from having any opinions on other people's kids, revolting and poorly-behaved though they might be.

(see spinny's blog for more on this)


Woot - I'd have loved to have worked with a real Penfold, although I would have been mightily tempted to do what DM did one episode, and steal his eyebrows, shouting 'yoink' as I did so . Penfold's eyebrows, as I recall, tended to float an inch or so above his head.

entropy said...

Shush.

james henry said...

Can't.

Jen said...

I'll never 'do London'* by foot ever again.

Thanks Spinsterella. :-p




*not like that, you dirty bugger, you!

POE said...

Jen, am slightly worried that you ended up in the ITV studios if you were looking for SB. It's a hell of a detour (unless there's a studio over there I don't know about)!

You've reminded me, my licence fee is due before tomorrow - better get on that now...

entropy said...

Oo, cross-posting confusion. Sorry James, the "shush" was a reference to DM/Penfold.

Though we did have to stop saying "shush" in that way at work when someone absent-mindedly "shushed" the manager.

leonie said...

why are you looking for a raven?

Anonymous said...

Je crois que le corbeau est dans le Tour de Londres, n'est pas? Et le Souris de Danger est dans la boite aux lettres rouge avec son ami 'Stylo-pli' et ses sourcils etonnants.

leonie said...

i had to look "corbeau" up before i made that comment above.
but "anonymous" is clearly showing off.

james henry said...

Anonymous clearly said: "I believe that the corbel is in the Turn of London, is not? And the Mouse of Danger is in limps - with - letters red with his/her friend “Pen-fold” and its eyebrows astonishing."

Also it's from here.

Jen said...

Poe - I was looking at a map and saw 'Television Studios'... twas the only one like it on the map so I thought; 'Here goes!'. Completely forgetting that Shepherd's Bush existed.

Damn.

Oh - on a side note, wondered if you could spell check something for me, James? :p GW - The Finale - Magazine Teasers

james henry said...

Spelling fine (but I'm not the best person to ask really). Posters excellent, jolly well done.