Patroclus and I decide to take Blue Kitten for her very first swim, at a nearby hotel pool. I emerge from the changing rooms to find P and BK already splashing happily in the separate kids' mini-pool bit.
I remember something my mum told me, which is that in order to get babies used to the water, you have to very quickly dunk them under the surface, which isn't as bad as it seems, because babies know to naturally hold their breath, and the whole thing is over in half a second, and then they're used to water and don't mind being splashed a bit.
ME: (sternly) Right, I'm going to dunk her.
P: (mildly) Actually, she seems quite hap-
I take BK and bob her up and down in the water a couple of times, and on the count of three, dunk her very quickly below the surface of the water, then bring her back up to the surface again.
BK looks terribly upset for a moment, then a look of blissful calm spreads across her face.
ME: You see! She's absolutely fine.
At which point we both realise a certain amount of stuff has appeared in the water that wasn't there before.
ME: I don't think that swim nappy's quite as close-fitting as it ought to be.
P takes BK back into the changing room, while I guiltily inform the lady on the reception desk bit that the water might need a bit of a clean.
While I do lengths in the main pool, a young lad later emerges from the cleaning cupboard with a big syringe device, which which he dutifully sucks out all the stuff, then tips in some bleach-type liquid and puts a warning sign up.
As I get near to him, I pull another guilty face.
ME: I'm afraid that was technically my fault.
He gives me a rather odd look.