Thursday, February 16, 2006

See also, Spain.

There's a story going round that in Iran, danish pastries are being renamed 'Roses of the Prophet Mohammed'. Now I think this is probably nonsense, because for one thing I can't bring myself to believe Iranians actually called them 'danish pastries' in the first place. I don't know why, and I could of course be wrong, it just doesn't sound likely.

However I'm more than willing to start calling them 'Roses of the Prophet Mohammed', because it sounds brilliant, and will raise the level of my grocery shopping to an all-new spiritual high.

Also, I think cornish pasties should now be called 'Stuffed Meaty Shoes of Jesus'.

I wouldn't want anyone to mistake this for some kind of religious satire by the way, I genuinely really like the names. Also my take on the Middle East more or less boils down to 'ooh, those people in hot countries get a bit excitable, don't they?'*

Anyway, I have to go, I'm wanted on Question Time.

* And I still convinced that's as valid a political position as anything else. Although it doesn't explain Northern Ireland, which gets a bit grumpy, or Vikings, so it's not perfect, obviously.


Johanna said...

Ah, thank you James. Forthwith I shall call them Stuffed Meaty Shoes of Jesus, no matter what people say.

Abaculus said...

Vikings only got grumpy because they were coming relatively far south, where it's hotter than Scandinavia.

In fact Lindisfarne was still an island at the time the Danes raided it, and all islands are hot and sandy and have a palm tree on them.

Dave said...

I thought Jesus wore sandals? (I speak with some authority, having an MA in theology, and I’m sure I saw a picture of him wearing sandals.) Wouldn’t the contents fall out?

James Henry said...

I'm ashamed to say I thought of that, and went ahead anyway.

Even more shamingly, I once asked out loud why it is you never see a picture of Jesus wearing a crucifix. This was about a year ago, and there was a huge silence. I had to pretend I was joking, but I clearly wasn't.

Taiga the Fox said...

Here, where we are far more grumpier than Vikings, we call danish pastries Wieners
(or actually it might be something like Viennese breads).

And as far as I know Vienna is as far from Denmark as Cornwall is from, oh, nevermind.
But you might be right Iranians not calling those as danish pastries at all.

I wonder do they have Danish smörrebröds in Iran and how are they renamed?

Are You Mad? said...

Well they'd be Danish _______(Iranian word for pastries inserted here)....wouldn't they...?

Or is that too logical...?

Anonymous said...

I'd like to put in a word for cheesy pies.

Every cafe in Crete sells cheesy pies.

I think they should be renamed the cheesey gusset of the goddess Aphrodite.

Or is that getting controversial?

Dave said...

Swedish meatballs (as sold in Ikea [not that I've been in one for several years, and wild horses etc]) could be renamed Thor's Testicles.

Taiga the Fox said...

Sounds fiery.

Btw Danish pastries are called wienerbrød = Viennese bread also in Denmark.

Smørrebrøds are Danish open faced sandwiches and they look like
'----- of the Prophet Mohammed'.

I'll get me coat then.

BondBloke said...

call it what you will the humble Cornish Pasty still beat bloody Danish pastries!

BondBlike is a Cornishman in exile.

James Henry said...

*waves Cornishly*

Okapi said...

Mmmm. Stuffed Meaty Shoes of Jesus. Sacrelicious!*

*Sadly I can't claim this word as mine, but that doesn't stop me using it whenever I like. So there.