Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Thanks for all the lovely comments.

All much appreciated. My Mum came round last night, saw Blue Kitten grizzling in her cot, and swiftly had her in her arms, gently bouncing her gently up and down. Grizzling stopped in about half a second. Cue astonishment from me and Patroclus, who'd are still worrying about how you pick her up without her head falling off. However, we have now adopted the practice, and are thinking of starting a series of workshops set in the South of France to bring this wise old folk remedy to the masses.

Next Week: Babies like shiny things, apparently.

Stephen Mangan is already trying to set up Blue Kitten with his own infant son, although there are some complications about the dowry. I've had to explain that I'm considering a wide range of portfolios, including Blue Kitten going into indentured servitude to Steven Moffat until 2026, when she will be playing the first female Doctor Who. Anyway, it's early days yet.

Note to casual readers whose attitude to babies are that they're all pretty much pink bags of shite, so why go on about them : yes, I'm afraid this blog will go off the boil for a bit. Probably come back in a couple of weeks, when the novelty has worn off, and I'm back to whinging about producers again.

22 comments:

Boz said...

Can the same wise old folk remedy be adopted for Producers?

cello said...

Aaaah, you are already learning the bouncy-walk, which all babies under 3 months demand. Who wants to go to sleep in absolute stillness when you can be delightfully disorientated by your dad, and the contents of your stomach gently swirled around as you nod off?

Smat said...

trouble is, you carry on doing the bouncy walk carrying anything, even when they're teenagers (rather embarrasing in Tescos when you're spotted jiggling a pound of carrots and some milk0

ribbletonia said...

ahhhhh babies are ace. but yes the bouncy walk for producers would be something to see

james henry said...

I should done that with Jon Plowman. That or the airplane ride, where you grab a hand and a foot and swing them round in a circle. Let's wait and see who the new BBC 3 controller is before we commit.

scroobious said...

Well, as I'm expecting my very own pink bag of shite in 6 months, I'm enjoying it all greatly. And clearly my personal approval is all you were ever looking for, so carry on.

Dan said...

Best thing about babies? They can see black-and-white MUCH better than colour. So show them a chessboard -- it totally engrosses them. :)

Imo said...

don't worry about the wobbly head when picking up, have you tried bathing her yet!

james henry said...

Bathing her tonight. Coastguard and South West Water have been alerted.

Christopher Campbell-Howes said...

South of France? Of course. It's the only place.

Anonymous said...

She's lovely, congratulations to you both. Good luck with the bathing and watch out for the temperature changes (learned the hard way that they produce an interesting reaction). Have an industrial sized stack of towels and nappies handy - K

cello said...

I'm not sure Jon Plowman* is up to a airplane ride. I think he might expire. I reckon Andrew Newman is up to one though. Don't think you should be giving the BK airplane rides just yet, by the way.

*he actually looks a bit like a baby.

Marsha Klein said...

Oh gosh, the first bath! Don't worry, you'll be doing it in your sleep (maybe literally!) before long.
When I bathed number 2 daughter for the first time, number 1 daughter was astounded at how little time she actually spent in the water:

No.1 daughter: Is she getting out ALREADY?

Me: Yes, she's all finished.

No.1 daughter: But she hasn't even played with any toys...!

You see? So much fun awaits you all (I really mean that, btw!)

realdoc said...

The force of the suck is astonishing. We always wanted to try to stick one of ours to the wall in the manner of static charged balloons but never quite had the nerve. You could try it with a safety net.
PS Jiggly walk up and down th stairs is a good remedy for all manner of grizzling

Oli said...

Referring to yesterday's picture, as I somewhat missed the boat: that's some serious cute right there.

nanga parbat said...

Could it not be said that producers are little more than pink bags of shite in which case a spot of judicioulsy applied bouncing and jiggling might make all the difference to a meeting.

Congratulations to both of you - you've TOTALLY made an actual baby! And not even with Lego!

Woo Hoo!

d f mamea said...

Kitten-warblings totally understandable. have you been shown the power and glory of... swaddling? [cue day-early pirate noises]

and belated congratulations!

Anonymous said...

Blue Kitten is adorable - congratulations!
Jennifer
Portland, OR
USA

nuttycow said...

Belated congrats to you both (I'm so behind on the times)

Blue Kitten looks... well... like a baby :D but, ok, a cute one. (urg... is this a sign of impending cluckiness?)

Jayne said...

Oh, just go ahead and be as gooey as you like. It's only sensible if you've fathered the first female Doctor Who...

Belladona said...

Yeah, I for one wish to know the gory details. It is after all as close as I'll ever get to having one myself! I hope bathtime went well.

tracy said...

Oh I totally ge tthe gooey stuff, although my ovaries may need defending especialy as my youngest just weaned, I have 3 boys and love that loved up babymoon feeling!