I did another bit for Leila's fashion PDF, now retitled All The Rage. I'm on page 11, where I represent all men in the world. And may God have mercy on our souls.
An email from Ori reads:
Everyone you must call to save my mate Miranda Hart in FAME ACADEMY. She is the only one without a huge fan base but she's still hanging on in there - she beat Roland Rivoron in the vote off this week. Get your friends at work to call in too. Be creative and send out emails.
To save Miranda, call 09011 32 30 05 or text MIRANDA to 84466
Calls cost 50p with BT. Texts cost 50p + std network fee. At least 34p per vote goes to Comic Relief.
She's totally hilarious and completely brave to be doing the show in the first place. Before she got famous she worked for comic relief so its amazing for her to be doing this. Save her from the circle of fear on Wednesday and do something good for Comic Relief at the same time. Pick up the phone now at work and call for her. Lines are open.
Forward this email on and get people you know voting for her.
I can also vouch for the loveliness and perfect moral standing of Miranda Hart (she played Teal in Hyperspace, and was in Smack the Pony and has been a shining light of Genuine Funny in things that perhaps weren't so funny themselves). Obviously I won't be watching anything called Fame Academy myself because I would rather STICK RUSTY FUCKING NEEDLES IN MY EYES, but that shouldn't stop people voting for her.
I have a foolproof system with all that Comic Relief shit: every year I bypass the whole thing by carefully selecting a couple of specific charities, AND NOT GIVING THEM ANY MONEY EITHER. Hahahhahaha, might delete this bit later.
UPDATE: here are some seconds of Miranda in a thing that I don't know about. Which is wonky at the start. But still good.